Pre/Post Marriage Skills Workshop in 2014

March 20, 2014 Conscious Communication 1 of 3

April 3, 2014 Concepts of Marriage, How to Do it, 2 of 3

April 10, 2014 Healthy Merging, Putting it All Together 3 of 3

We provide pre-marriage counselling at our clinic in Singapore. Pre-marriage counselling is vital regardless of whether you are planning on marriage, newly wedded or in your honeymoon period. Love is the foundation for a good marriage; however, we supply the bricks that make it work by enhancing your problem-solving skills, merging individual wants into one set for marriage, and enhancing your communication skills to make it all possible. Marriage is grounded in making sure everyone’s needs are met, we teach you all the above through our counselling sessions.

Why Do People Need Pre-Wedding Marriage Counselling?

Marriage is a significant milestone, often marking the beginning of a new chapter filled with aspirations, dreams, and occasionally unforeseen challenges. Pre-marriage counselling acts as a compass, guiding couples through the complexities that can arise on this new journey.

For starters, every individual carries their unique set of beliefs, values, and personal experiences into a marriage. These differing viewpoints can sometimes lead to misunderstandings and conflicts between couples. Pre-marriage counselling helps couples navigate these differences, fostering a mutual understanding and laying a strong foundation for their marital life.

Communication, often cited as a pillar of healthy relationships, is another focal point. Many couples assume they communicate well until they find themselves amidst misunderstandings.

Furthermore, marriage introduces a myriad of practical considerations. From financial planning, roles and responsibilities, intimacy, to aspirations about family and children, there’s a lot to discuss. Addressing these topics beforehand minimises future surprises and potential points of contention.

Pre-marriage counselling is not just about troubleshooting; it’s also about enrichment. It offers couples the space to celebrate their strengths, making their bond even more resilient. Ultimately, it’s an investment in the long-term health and happiness of a marriage.

What Happens in Premarital Counselling?

Beginning with an initial assessment, the pre-marriage counsellor gains an understanding of the couple’s relationship history, individual backgrounds, and current dynamics. Subsequent sessions dive deep into pivotal aspects of marital life, with topics ranging from understanding each partner’s communication style to discussions about financial expectations, family planning, intimacy, conflict resolution, and personal values. Couples will also partake in exercises that might include role-playing scenarios, guided conversations, or homework to encourage discussions outside the counselling space.

One of the core elements of pre-marriage counselling is the facilitation of open communication between couples. The counsellor acts as a neutral party, guiding conversations and ensuring both partners feel safe and validated in expressing their feelings.

Couples also receive tools and techniques to strengthen their bond. They learn about active listening, the importance of empathy, and ways to manage conflicts without causing harm to the relationship.

Moreover, by addressing potential stressors like financial planning or family dynamics proactively, couples can strategise solutions before these challenges escalate in their married life.

Ultimately, pre-marriage counselling is an investment in a couple’s future. It offers them a foundation, built on understanding and mutual respect, which can be instrumental in navigating the intricate journey of marriage.

Requirements for a Successful Marriage

A prosperous and enriching marriage needs a couple who understands the purpose of coming together through marriage and has clarified their short and long-term goals and values. The couple needs to be able to balance the contradicting pressures of sex, money, time and family to attain a win-win situation. Prospering couples don’t simply assume agreement, instead, they are proactive in discussion, negotiation and compromise. For instance, clear and defining lines need to be established for the issues of monogamy, infidelity, respect and companionship. This success is only attainable through advanced interpersonal and relationship tools. Develop these with the best pre-marriage counsellor in Singapore.

Ask yourself if you’re getting married for the right reasons with the help of this article. 

Be More than a Statistic

Global research has found that by year 7 of a marriage, the divorce rate is 50%! Furthermore, those who avoid divorce are often discontented and unhappy. Indeed, second marriages have a divorce rate of 60% for those without children and as high as 70% for those with.

Imagine this, would you fly in a plane if there was a 50% chance of a crash? Probably not. Yet, this is the decision that many couples make, risking marriage without having the tools they need to succeed. Good marriages thrive on solid marriage concepts and purpose best discovered before marriage. Learn and master the tools and skills to flourish as a couple with pre-marriage counselling.

Invest in Your Marriage Through Pre-Marriage Counselling

As soon as a couple starts thinking about marriage, they should undertake pre-marriage counselling. Our services in Singapore go beyond judging compatibility, we give you the tools to resolve differences in order to build a better and more solid future. Gottman’s research has shown that all couples, irrespective of compatibility, spend around 80% of their time in conflict and/or disagreement. We give you the skills to work through this.

It is vital to understand that the decisions you make today have large future repercussions, affecting happiness, family and finances. Through making an initial investment today, you are able to assess what underpins your marriage and create goals that are realistic and sustainable. Be prepared and avoid the drastic emotional and financial costs of divorce.

These statistics are an unfortunate reality, making it better to invest now for a happy and durable marriage. With our help, these skills are very easily learned, and their returns are amazing. Indeed, the optimum time to learn these skills is pre-marriage.

Women! Read the latest research on how cold feet or marriage doubt increases the risk of divorce.

Sustain your Happiness Through Premarital Counselling

Couples in love can often overlook or ignore already present concerns. Wishful thinking often overrides reality, love blinds all and it can often blind couples from future reality. Love can only maintain marriage for so long and it’s vital that couples understand communication and difference management. Couples must learn effective compromise to create a win-win situation for the marriage. Our pre-marriage counselling focuses on conduct and contact, not compatibility. Strengthen your relationship through actionable steps with our help.

Tailored Pre-Wedding Marriage Counselling

Our pre-marriage counselling in Singapore generally covers the following:

  • Understanding your purpose for marriage
  • Analysing and enhancing goals, as well as the means to discuss and enact them
  • Developing a marriage contract that delves into dealing with finance, sex, time management, family, friends and monogamy/infidelity boundaries
  • Advanced conflict management
  • Realising that marriage relies upon key concepts, like effective negotiation to achieve a win-win for a couple, giving 100% effort, the concept that fairness is not equal and more

Our experienced pre-marriage counsellor, Tammy Fontana, M.S., NCC, CTRT is here to enhance your marriage by giving you the skills to avoid relationship hazards. Sessions are tailored to provide you with the tools you need. Tammy is a Certified Choice Theory Reality Therapist and has completed level 2 training in Gottman’s Methodology for Marriage.

Email us for more information, including our workshop schedule or our brochure.

About Our Pre-Marriage Counsellor

Ms. Tammy Fontana is a seasoned therapist based in Singapore, bringing over thirteen years of immersive experience from both the expatriate and Singaporean communities. Merging her U.S. clinical training with deep insights into local cultures, she delivers culturally sensitive therapy. Having earned her M.S. in Mental Health Counseling from the renowned Capella University, USA, Ms. Fontana specialises in relationship, and premarital counselling. Her extensive training in sex therapy from the Advanced Mental Health Training Institute (AMHTI) equips her with nuanced skills to address intimacy concerns. Ms. Fontana is also trained in the Gottman Method Couples Counselling, renowned for its evidence-based approach to fostering stronger partnerships. With an unwavering commitment to continuous learning, she ensures that her clients benefit from the most up-to-date and effective therapeutic practices. For those seeking guidance in nurturing fulfilling relationships, Ms. Fontana is available for appointments throughout the week in-office and also through online therapy for your convenience.

Frequently Asked Questions About Pre-Marriage Counselling

What is the difference between marital and premarital counselling?

Marriage counselling typically aims to mend or rejuvenate existing relationships. On the other hand, premarital counselling helps unwed couples who are in search of guidance, hoping to gain valuable insights and acquire tools that will prepare them better for their forthcoming marital journey.

What questions do premarital counsellors ask?

  • Why are you getting married?
  • Why were you attracted to each other?
  • What issues do you disagree about?
  • How will you manage your finances together?
  • How will we divide chores?
  • Do you or do you not want children, and if yes, how many?
  • Where will you live?
  • Should you do everything together?
  • What is your sexual compatibility?
  • What are your views of cheating?

This non-exhaustive list of questions aim to facilitate deep and meaningful discussions, ensuring couples enter marriage with a mutual understanding and aligned expectations.

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