Are you somebody that has a lot of fear of being rejected? Do you describe yourself as having low self-esteem, low self-worth? Do you often find that people are rejecting you? Do you have a hard time understanding why sometimes people have negative reactions to you? Do you find that maybe your fear of being rejected causes you to be anticipatorily aggressive with people?
People who self-describe as having low self-esteem or trust issues or fear of rejection or abandonment often have issues with unknowingly being aggressive with people that they are building relationships with or have relationships with.
The reason for the aggression is that they are unconsciously so afraid of the pain of being rejected that they often reject first. And what it looks like is they can have aggressive or hostile reactions in anticipation of somebody rejecting them before they have even been rejected. As a result people react to the aggression they have received and then the person gets the rejection they were anticipating.
The person who has low self-esteem and self-worth often is unaware of these patterns. S/he is unaware of their defensiveness and their aggression. They do not intend to be so aggressive. In fact, they may not see it as aggression, they may see it as just being normal. They are truly unaware and if brought to their attention they often feel bad or defensive. When people point it out they may defend themselves saying people reject them, people are not nice… They are not aware of how their patterns of behaviour are contributing to the situation.
If this sounds like you or somebody that you love, therapy is a process of helping people become aware of how low self-esteem, insecurity, fear of abandonment, lack of trust or having trust issues impairs a person’s ability to develop relationships. Relationships are the key to all people’s success, both personally and professionally. Learning how to become aware of one’s patterns, thinking and belief systems can help people learn new ways to address these underlying issues.
If you would like to learn how therapy might help you, contact us for initial consultation at +65 9030 7239. We prefer WhatsApp messaging as we are with clients.
All in the Family Counselling Centre Pte Ltd has been providing therapy for over a decade and providing online therapy for over four years. We provide in person therapy via intensives of two, three or five days. If you would like to learn more about how we can help you, please reach out to us. We look forward to helping you get the life that you want!
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Through an initial consultation we'll help you frame goals and outcomes of therapy and what that would look like to achieve it.